Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Jamie aka Fat 'n' Sassy's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, January 1st, 2005
12:47 am	Another year, same old shit! Yeah! Ringing in the new year...alone and depressed and not even wasted! UGH! I HATE THE HOLIDAY SEASON! First it's Christmas, which reminded me of Cody because I still have his gift from last year that we never exchanged. Plus Dec. 26th marked one year since Cody came over and it was also the last time we kissed and the first time he met my family. Now it's New Years and I'm alone. I'm always alone on New Years. It drives me crazy. Everywhere you look people are counting down and kissing. Everywhere! Every channel! Every where! And to make matters worse all of my friends are either engaged or married. So really, no matter who I hung out with I would have been the third wheel. Me and a couple. Or worse yet, the ones that have kids. Alot of my friends have kids. So I stayed her with my parents. Yeah just me and my parents. Even my brother had someone to kiss at midnight. He went to his girlfriend's. Who'd I have, nobody. And all I could think of the whole time was Cody. Where is he? Where are they? Is he still with her? Where are they? Is he kissing her at midnight? Is he with her now? Where are they? It's sickening, both emotionally and physically. I hate it. I hate this feeling. This loneliness. I have no one. I want to call someone so badly and just vent, just cry, just let it all out, but I can't. I hate sympathy. I hate being felt sorry for. I just want someone to sit there and listen and hug me. I don't want them to tell me I'm better off alone or if it was meant to be he'll come back or he made a big mistake leaving me or they're sure he's missing me too. I'm sick of hearing it! I'm sick of hearing people! I just want someone to hear me, to listen and say nothing. I've learned to distract myself by making my arms bleed and watching as the blood flows down my arm and eventually dries. It's not healthy, but it works. I forget for a little while and then the next day I wake up. Then it all starts again. I want to go back to Manchester. I can't wait until next semester when I have the room all to myself. I just want to be able to hide in there. To hide in there and exercise my worries away. Exercise until I pass out on the floor. I did that through high school alot. I would just keep working out and working out until I couldn't do it anymore, but then I'd keep going until I couldn't even stand or get up and I'd wake up the next morning all gross and smelly on the floor. It was my stress reliever and it worked. I don't have it anymore because I have a damn roommate. I would go to the gym, but I have a fear of sweating in front of other people. I can just imagine them thinking, "Oh gawd, that fat chick is all gross and sweaty! She's gonna collapse or something!" So I resorted to working out in my room when my roommate wasn't around. It was easy last year, Katie left every weekend. But this year, Corrine doesn't leave often, track keeps her on campus. I have the layout of the room all planned out when she leaves. I'm doing it too. The moment she's gone. I don't care if I have to lug all that furniture around by myself, it's happening. Well, the blood's dry...time to find something else to occupy my time. Current Mood: depressed Current Music: Basement Jaxx - Good Luck (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, October 30th, 2004
2:24 am	Halloween Party confusion.... So I just got back from the Brown House Halloween party. It was a hella lota fun, however, I'm slightly perplexed. I've been to many parties at the Brown House in my 2 years here at MC and never have any guys really paid me much attention. Tonight, however, there were lots of guys all telling me how beautiful I was and I was told I was the hottest girl there and just lots of flattering comments. There was a LOT of alcohol at this party, which could factor into some of the reasons for the compliments, but alot of them came from guys before they started drinking or guys who weren't drinking at all. I just don't get it. I've NEVER gotten attention from complete strangers at a Broen House party before. Why tonight? Was it the alcohol? Was it the fact that I was dressed as a cheap mail-order bride? I'm so confused, but right off the top of my head I can think of 8 guys who complimented me and numerous girls too. It's just so weird. I got a phone number, but I'm afraid to call him. I've seen this guy numerous times on campus and have been introduced and reintroduced to him by many different people. He can never seem to remember me or my name, which leads me to believe that in my everyday casual dress he doesn't find me attractive. But obviously in my slutty Halloween attire guys have a different opinion. It kinda makes me feel like the real me just isn't attractive. I just feel so fake now. I feel like these guys like me for something I'm not, I'm not slutty, I'm not easy, even though my costume might have said otherwise. It was a fun costume, it has nothing to do with the real me. I don't want to get hurt by someone who may have gotten the wrong impression. I just really don't know what to do. I'm glad I went, I had a really good time, but I just get really confused when I'm paid attention to based solely on my appearance, yeah it's flattering, but also degrading at the same time. I'm more than my looks, so don't judge me on that. Current Mood: contemplative (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, October 8th, 2004
5:37 pm	So, I had to download (upload? something?) all my pics from my online portfolio onto my computer. Yeah that took forever and a day. So now I have 120+ pics of myself just chillin on my computer. Well my screen saver is a collaboration of all the pics saved on here. So all day long I get to see all these pics of me over and over and over and over. And I've come to realize... that's not me. That girl flashing across my screen in different clothes, different poses, different backgrounds, looking hot, looking sexy...that's not me. It feels like it's someone else. Like I have a creepy made obsession with this girl. I want to be her, I want to meet her, I want to touch her, I want to see her, but I can't. She's someone else entirely. When I look in the mirror I don't see her, this carefree, happy, youthful, beautiful, photogenic, lovely being...I see me, all my imperfections, frizzy hair, neglected dry skin, tired appearance...I don't look like her. If you put pictures of her and I side by side they'd be two different people. One would be beautiful and the other gross, tired, worn-out, tattered. She's foreign to me, an exotic land I'll never visit, a magnificent masterpiece I'll never create, she's so distant. The more I watch these pictures go by, one by one by one by one, for hours and hours and hours and hours I'm mesmerized by this person. She's so close yet so far. She's here on my screen, but who is she, where did she come from, why is she there? I'm afraid I'll never be her again, actually I KNOW I'll never be her again. I'll never see her again, I'll never feel her again, I'll never think like her again, or see things the way did. I'm not her. Current Mood: confused (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 6th, 2004
1:09 pm	RePrEsEnTiN' Hell yah! Go my home-town! We made the national news! LOL http://cnn.aimtoday.cnn.com/news/story.jsp?flok=FF-APO-1120&idq=/ff/story/0001%2F20041005%2F1724136407.htm&sc=1120&flok=NW_4-L2 Current Mood: embarrassed (Comment on this)
Friday, October 1st, 2004
8:04 pm	I think it's prime time for an update.... Okay, school has got me trapped in a cycle of eating very little, sleeping very little and studying alone in my room nonstop. Kinda sux, but hopefully things will level out. The legal issues are all resolved! WooHoo! I got a pretrial diversion, which = probation for a year. Not too bad. Plus Eliot Sloan, the lead singer of Blessid Union of Souls sent m $500, more than enough to cover all the charges, bought me a beautiful ring to remind me to be good for the next year and still keeps in contact with me. So it wasn't entirely a negative experience. I passed out the other day while trying to donate blood. The lack of eating and sleeping and high levels of stress caught up with me. It was quite an interesting experience though. Kinda an out-of-body, heavy dep sleep sensation. It was kinda nice. But it really freaked the nurses out considering 4 of them were surrounding me trying to wake me up. My parents and I aren't getting along too well right now. It seems everytime I make an advancement in my "modeling" they bring me down. My agent is wanting me back after he fired me for the whole legal deal. However, my parents don't want me to work with him and are refusing to help me. Plus, the figure drawing modeling job I had last year is requiring their models this year to go topless. I don't have a problem with this because the people that are allowed in are dedicated artists and some are professionals. But my parents found out and said if I keep the job they're going to kick me out of the house. UGH! So I haven't spoken with them in 2 days. My grandma is back in intensive care, which I am worried about. She's not healthy and very weak. So the procedures they can put her through are very limited. I couldn't take a shower today because there was NO hot water! I let the shower run for 5 minutes and it was still ice cold! So I was like screw that! lol I'm dirty! My roommate is SO disrespectful! She does SO many things that I'm just like, "Have you NO common courtesy!?!?!?!" I don't want to go into detail about it right now, maybe later. But we have to sign "roommate contracts" about things like lighting and the room temp. and various things and I have a feeling that will be quite a hellacious experience considering we agree on NOTHING! She's a good person, but she's just SO disrespectful, which I can't even begin to comprehend. There's a party tonight I'm going to stop by. Can't stay for too long though because the cops are busting them left and right and I don't want to be there should it get busted. But it's a friend's b-day party and I think I should atleast make an appearance. There's a group going to Chicago tomorrow morning. I wanted to go SO bad, but money is tight right now, especially if I have to quit my job. No one could give me a ballpark estimate of the price it would be to go, so I'll be staying here. :'( Which is okay because there's some town-wide happenings and I need to go shopping anyway. I've killed 3 highlighters just in the short time I've been here and desperately need more. Plus I need other things, so it won't be a total waste. Well I am off. Current Mood: exhausted Current Music: silence (Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 15th, 2004
9:00 pm	UGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH! So EVERYONE and there neighbors here are sick! There's over 300 students at a private college sick! UGH! Plus, 2/3 of my roommates are sick! UGH! As far as the court thing, I've just went through a giant phone-calling circle and still have no answers and pretty much no witnesses. I was flat out told that without an attorney I WOULD NOT WIN! I was told this by another attorney! Great huh? Yeah yippee! So tomorrow I shall make more calls and if I can't get the answers I'm searching for then I'll have to start calling attornies! *rolls eyes* (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, September 13th, 2004
11:09 am	I'm so scared. Okay, my court date is in a week. Everytime I think I have things organized they all come crashing down on me. It seems it would be easy to find people who were in the bar that night who can sign a statement saying I wasn't there. THAT'S IT! A signature! No court appearance, no committment, just your name! But people are scared and I understand, I'm scared too. It's kinda ironic how I worked so hard all summer to lose weight and here in just the past week I've lost so much more that I can't stand to look in the mirror. I look dead......sickly. I cry when I look in the mirror because I'm dying. I know I am. I can count all the things I've eaten in the past week on one hand. I can't eat, I'm too scared to eat, too nervous. I figure I'd better get used to it now though, because if I do end up in jail I'd rather starve myself to death than cause shame to my family. That's what hurts the most, just knowing they're ashamed of me. Knowing that when people ask them how I'm doing, they can't tell them the truth because they're ashamed. I've failed as a daughter. I keep trying to make it better, trying to fix it on my own, but everytime I think I have a witness they bail out. It's just a damn signature! People won't even sign a damn paper to keep me out of jail! The selfishness of some people amazes me. Maybe I deserve it.... (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 8th, 2004
4:07 pm	CLICK HERE AND WE CAN BOTH WIN $100,000!!!!!!! http://jg244g.VOTEorNOT.org (Comment on this)
Friday, September 3rd, 2004
10:38 pm	OH MY GAWD! Oh my gawd! I'm SO not breathing! I just had the greatest time EVER! ...............But first.................... I was really stressed out today because nothing was working out with my scheduling and I called my mom crying and I e-mailed my advisor crying. So Robert met with me and we figured everything out and he got me out of the horrible Intro. to Old Testament class. So now everything is beautiful. SO my day got brighter. Then there was a Blessid Union of Souls concert and I got free tickets because I'm a student. They were row D, but I worked the system and got in the front row. So me and my friends were all dancing and jumping and having alot of fun. Then the guitarist started walking towards the edge of the stage and being stupid and hyper and out-going I reached for him and he reached out, grabbed my hand and dragged me on the stage! :D And he sang "She Likes Me For Me" to me! :D It was o awesome! And he kissed me! The lead singer of a famous band KISSED ME! lol WooHoo! It was awesome! They invited me to hang out with them after the show, along with the group of students that hosted theie visit. Well I knew they were going to a bar and of course I'm under-age, and I didn't have a ride to this bar, so I wasn't going to go. Well he said he wanted to say bye to me before they took off on tour again, so he asked for my room number, which my suitemate gave to him excitedly! lol We came back to the room and waited and he and another bandmate came up. Elliot, the lead singer, asked me to compose an e-mail in my account, I did and he e-mailed himself so he would have my e-mail address. :D Well, they told me they were going to try to perform at a local bar and wanted me to hang out back-stage, which is allowed in my home-town even if you are under-age. So after some persuasion and a promise that I could ride in their van, I went! Yeah I rode in Blessid Union of Souls van!!!! So on the way I was told if anything did happen and for some reason I wasn't allowed in, they would bring me back and everything would be alright. So................................ We get there and they tell the people I'm with the band. The security guy asks me to stand off to the side and wait. So I waited and waited and waited and finally another guy (security guard) came and asked me to follow him. He lead me to a police car, who totally in a ass-hole way interrogated me and freaking scared me to death because I have NEVER been in trouble with the law before. He didn't believe who I was because I had no former police reports! What kind of a stereotype is that?!?!?! I've NEVER been in trouble wih the law and I told him that! But, he stil didn't believe me so he put me in the car and away we went to jail! And on the way there, he was reading his digital screen about who I was and ALL my info and he said, "5'8", 132lbs!, " turned around and looked at me bawling in the backseat and said "YEAH RIGHT!!! Who are you really!?!?!?" Okay yeah, when I got my license I weighed 132, I don't anymore, but is it really professional for a cop to tell me that?!?!?! Nonetheless I was polite and said "sir" and tried my hardest to stay calm. So we get to the jail and he still doesn't believe who I am, even though I can tell him ALL the info he finds about this odd Jamie chick on his records. So we get there and he handcuffs me (at least he was nice about that) and takes me in, he fills out the paper work and puts down "Minor in Bar" (okay.....ummmmmm......I was never "in" the bar!) and "false information" (which has a $750.00 dollar bail and I was going to have to stay in jail until Tuesday because it's Labor Day weekend!). So he tells me this and I start bawling exclaiming that I'm a straight A student and I don't want to miss school (we go on Labor Day) because I'm in jail. So after awhile the jack-ass cop feels sorry for me and scratches the false info part. Phwew! So I'm put in a cell and because they have SO MANY DUIs tonight it took them 4 and 1/2 hours to get me processed, in the meantime I sat alone in my cell and smiled at people and was polite and said please and thank you and everyone was SO nice to me. There was a cell FULL of guys beside me and when I went with this wonderfully nice woman to get finger printed they all went to the glass and stared, which had the whole jail in laughter! lol So finger-printing was fun, it's computerized alot now, which is cool. The only part that REALLY bothered me was when I had to give them the necklace with Cody's rock in it. I've never been without that thing and it scared me. So after being printed I could make a phone call, but the phone in my cell didn't work, so since they assumed I wasn't a threat and I was technically released anyway, they let me sit in the lobby and call my parents. I did and of course they weren't interested in picking me up, but since I didn't have my cell phone because the battery was dead and I didn't have a spare, I had no one else to call. So my dad gave me his credit card # and told me to call a cab. Good idea, but I was on a pay phone and all I had was a $20. So after crying to the desk sargeant and still getting no help a woman who was there in the lobby waiting to pick up her husband and what looked to be a lawyer handed me 50 cents and I called a cab service, just to discover that the phone dialed out, but the receiver didn't work so the people on the other end can't hear you. So I hung up the phone and fell on the floor crying, knowing I was an hour away from school, 5 hours away from home and no one except a band who was on tour knew where I was at and the police couldn't help me! So the same lady offered me her cell phone and I called a cab service, but since I didn't have the actually credit card at first they refused to pick me up, but when I told them where I needed to be taken, dollar signs filled their eyes and they agreed. So I hugged the lady and she was SO nice. I went outside and waited fo my cab with another police officer, who explained to me that I had a court date on Tuesday and I should claim something, I don't remember the terminology, but it's not "guilty" and it's not "not guilty." I also told him which cop caught me and without saying anything that had happened he said, "OH THAT GUY'S AN ASS-HOLE!!!!" hahah I found that funny! He showed me where I needed to go on Tuesday and where to park and when to get there and was quite helpful. Then he asked why I was there and I told him my story and he said that some towns allow minors to go backstage with bands, but they don't and normally a cop won't arrest you if you're trying to get in with the band. He thought the cop was alittle rude too! So a cab picked me up and we drove an hour to college and rang up a nice $100.20 fee, but it was the first time I had ever been in a cab and the driver was really nice. I got back at the dorm at 6am! Yeah, that means I spent 6 hours in or around or trying to get get away from a jail! UGH! So I called my parents to let them know I was okay and got a whole lecture and was told my dad was considering ripping me out of college and they had ALL the police in the county looking for me! Gee-zo. But I'm here and even though the band PROMISED to take care of me, they left me to rot in jail. So I am no longer a Blessid Union of Souls fan. EVER! I only went because they promised to take care of me and make sure I got back okay, which they did neither! Well I'm dead tired and my roomoe is already awake for practice. SO off to bed. Current Mood: aggravated (11 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 2nd, 2004
11:22 pm	No classes rocks! Okay so last night I was out hanging with friends until around 2:00 because the one class I was suppose to have today the professor dropped me from because I was the only underclassmen enrolled and we me he had an odd number. I thought it was rather rude. So now I have to add a class to replace that one and add another one because I need to take more hours if I'm planning on getting out of here anytime soon. Anyway, we had fun hanging out. I also went to a guy's floor where a bunch of my friend's live and slapped people with a giant pixie stick and proclaimed, "I AM THE PIXIE FAIRY!!!" Quite entertaining! Then I found this squeegie dish washing thing with dish soap in the handle and went around askin guys if I could wash them! lol It was quite a fun night. That is until a friend from back home called me to tell me another friend had died in a car wreck. What a great way to end the first day of school. That was quite disheartening. I cried and didn't fall asleep until around 6ish AM. I woke up at 1:30 this afternoon and ran some errands. I obviously didn't go to class because the prof doesn't want me there. I e-mailed some other profs and begged them to let me enroll into their full classes. Hopefully everything will work out. I got all my posters and decorations hung up in the room. I love it. It looks so much better and it makes me happy. I met this wonderfully great and perfect guy today and found out he was gay. I'm still in love with him though! I swear I'm a gay man stuck in a woman's body because I love gay men! lol We had an activities fair today and I signed up for alot of clubs and organizations. It was fun, I saw alot of people too. And I made giant colorful pixie sticks! :D lol Now I am sitting here and my back is aching. Doug just left. He was here for about an hour or so talking. He's a cool guy. I might need Will to give me another massage tomorrow because I hurt. lol My mom was mad at me because I haven't eaten hardly anything, but I was out so much I really hadn't realized it until she asked. I had: Pack of mini muffins Blueberry muffin bar crackers water chocolate milk I was shocked. I have a balloon turtle!!!! YEAH! He's albino and I named him Franz Ferdinand! lol He's also handicapped because one of his legs deflated. lol I still love him though! Well that is it. Sleep time! 8 am class! WooHoo! Current Mood: sore Current Music: Radical Cheerleader Chants! lol (Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 31st, 2004
9:47 pm	Swing your partner! So today I slept in quite a bit, until 10ish. I didn't see my roommate ANY today. It's weird living with e person, but both of you being so busy you never see each other. lol My beautiful Carrie Hook came over and we had lunch and we hung out most of the day until she had to go to work, but it was great to see her again. Gorky gave me some Indian jewelry. Two purpley bracelets and a gorgeous black and white necklace! I love it. I hung out with Aja and her group some more and flirted with the hottie freshman! Yeah I'm a cradle robber, but I like it. I went a visited my beloved Timmy too! That kid is the greatest! He's so funny and we have a great time. We flirt alot, but he has a girlfriend, so it's all just in good fun. I received some great compliments which made me feel spectacular! First there was a female professor walking down the sidewalk in the opposite direction I was and she stopped me and said: Her: "Are you a new student?" Me: "No, I'm a sophomore." Her: "I don't remember you from last year....what's your major?" Me: "Soc/Psych w/ a minor in gender studies." Her: "I don't recall EVER seeing you last year. And trust me you're not someone I would forget. You're beautiful....like a perfect picture. You're just beautiful! I don't mean that in a weird sexist way." Me: "Awwwwwww, thank you!" Her: "Well good luck and I hope to see you in class sometime." I thought that was SOOOOOOOO SWEET! And people have been really noticing my weight loss, which is exciting. We had a square dance tonight and I showed up just to goof off and see people. The hottie freshman approached me and we talked for a bit. I was happy. Then Aja admitted to me that this morning before the palm reading she told him I was interested. Oh no! But he hasn't backed off, so maybe it's good. I tend to hang out and try to make the new kids feel comfortable, so if I see them around I'll be sure to say hi and talk to them. Manny and Janicka, two freshman from Aja's group, and Aja and I were all hanging out towards the end of the night. I was goofing off and having fun and Manny looked at Aja and laughed and said he liked hanging out with me and then Janicka said, "Yeah she's really cool. She just has one of those personalities everyone likes." I felt so great. I was blushing, but I love these kids and I know how scary the first year is and how I really appreciated my SOL hangin out with me and making me more comfortable. I guess I'm doing a swell job. I'm dead tired and tomorrow is the first day of classes! AHHHHHHHHHH! Hmmmmmm, today: Strawberry yogurt granola bar 2 cookies cottage cheese pasta rice and potatoes chocolate milk tea mini wheat thins I've been so busy I've kinda forgotten to eat. lol Current Mood: tired (2 Comments |Comment on this)
2:57 am	Back at the MC! So today was quite a fun-filled day. I woke up early, packed the remaining stuff, kissed all my pets good-bye, followed my dad for 4 hours, talked him into stopping at a CHEAP mini-mart to by last minute food, got to MC, moved ALL my stuff in, went and ate Chinese (Mmmmmmmmmm), came back, said bye to my parents and then had fun with some of my friends. Get this. My roomie said she hadn't had time to mess with setting up the room so I could do whatever I wanted and move whatever I wanted to. So me and my parents spent HOURS fitting everything nicely in the room while she was at work. Well the room looked like she just stacked the shelves and everything in a mess on top of each other. So we moved them around to give us the most shelving space both on and above the shelves. She comes back fomr work and says, "Oooooohh, I kinda liked the things stacked high....." UGH! By then my back was hurting and I was freaking starving from trying to get the room completely done to surprise her that I was like, OH DEAR GAWD! So me and my family left because we were exhausted and hungry. We went to a Chinese Buffet because my dad was like, "Pick a restaurant." And I was getting a headache from not eating and I pointed to the first one I saw. lol It was good though. They had these AWESOME little fruit things called louquats. Oh my goodness! They were GOOD! Afterward I had to say goodbye to my parents, which upset me more thanI thought it would. I was alittle upset. Shortly after they went I went to seek some comfort from my friends. I found one immediately and she invited me to come wonder with her and another girl named Celeste. Celeste showed us some Wiccan stuff. She read tarot cards for me and I also met a cool guy named Manny. All the freshman this year seem really cool. Then my friend invited me to go with her and the freshmen group she's been leading around all week. So I went and we watched some skits about problems that could happen in college and what you should do about them. It was fun. There is the HOTTIE-EST freshman in her group! He's CUTE! And we talked and talked and talked and I think I want him! lol He has the most perfect smile! Awwwww, I want him. So I hung out with them for the skits and then went with them to a freshmen entertainment night thing. It was FUN! There was a HUGE inflateable slide, bungee things, jousting, and of course I did them all! It was so much fun! Then I hung out with some more friends and now I'm here. A guy offered to give me a massage, so I waited for an hour and a half for him and then figured if he reall wanted to give me one he would have been here by now. So now I am off to bed because my back is killing me! I could have used that massage! Current Mood: sore Current Music: Silence (Comment on this)
Sunday, August 29th, 2004
8:56 pm	Tomorrow! Tomorrow! I love ya! Tomorrow! You're Only A Day AWAY! Okay, today I went to church and said goodbye to all those wonderful people. Kinda a sad moment. Came home and packed for 4 hours. Let me tell ya, my mom is the master packer! She got EVERYTHING to fit in my car and the truck and even left me visual space! I can SEE out my windows! When I left school last year I had less than HALF the stuff I have in there now and I couldn't see out of ANY of my windows, the trunk barely closed, half the front windshield as blocked by stuff, passenger seat was FULL, I even had stuff in my LAP WHILE I was DRIVING! It was terrible! I thought I was going to die! But my mom got everything to fit perfectly! So I was excited! So now I'm done packing until tomorrow morning when I have to make sure that after I use something it gets put in my suitcase. I have TWO lists for tomorrow. One for things I still need to pack that are upstairs and one for things that are downstairs. I asked my dad for a spare key to my car because I'm afraid I'll lock mine in my car and be 200 miles away from a spare. (I locked my keys in my car for the FIRST TIME this summer! UGH!) So he asked to see my key, I gave him the key I had just used to open my car and the key I have used to start it for the past 9 years. Well he looked at it and in a pissy voice said, "Where's your car key???" Me- "It's the ONLY car key on there." Him- "This FORD key!!! Why do you have a FORD KEY to a MAZDA!?!?!" Me- "Well, it just opened my car and has started it for the past 9 years! I don't know why they gave me a Ford key for a FORD PROBE!" I swear my dad can be an idiot sometimes. Luckily, he just shrugged his shoulders and walked off and found me a spare. I was afraid he would try to argue and I would have to prove to him that it was indeed my car key! He hates being wrong. So today, I ate (dang it, I left the list downstairs!): Boiled egg w/cheese 2 veggie sausage patties milk Baked tomato casserole (1 cup) SMALL handful Cheddar Chex Mix milk w/cinnamon and Sweet & Low Cottage Cheese Fresh green beans 6 veggie chicken nuggets w/ BBQ sauce milk w/cinnamon and sweet & low water 1 spoonful fried potatoes and vegetables 2 chocolate caramel cookies Yeah, that was everything. Not terrible, most the things were healthy. I packed all my clothes without leaving anything to wear for the trip back to school. So had to dig and dig and dig to find a pair of baggy jeans, a blue tank top, a red bra (yes I packed ALL my bras and underwear!), and an OLD pair of underwear that I wore in like Jr High! lol Oops! I can be so dumb! Hopefully everything goes smoothly tomorrow. I've never followed my dad before so I'm kinda nervous. He's driving the truck and I have to follow him. Which is weird because I had a car on campus almost the whole year, but I don't remember follwing him last year and I know my mom WON'T drive on huge highways. So how did my car get there? I'm perplexed! It's a mystery! Actually I don't think I had a car for the first month of college (I don't remember having a car atleast), but then all I remember is having a car! I don't recall when or how it got there, but it was there....hmmmmmmmm. Oh well, I'm driving Willi there tomorrow! Well I must go, I need my sleep if we're gonna be out of here by 8 and have a 4 hour drive! UGH! Current Mood: anxious Current Music: Sunshine - Lil Flip (Comment on this)
Saturday, August 28th, 2004
10:56 pm	YAY! GirLz DaY OuT! WooHoo! So today I got up bright and early to go to yard sales with my mom and sister. Wow, we had fun and found some killer deals! We decided yard-saling should be an Olympic sport! lol Some of the goodies I got were: $73 worth of Boyd Bears (valued at almost $400! Not a bad investment!) A framed Dale Earnhardt poster (OH I love that man!) 5 CDs Clothes, clothes, clothes! (Most brand new with tags! Gotta love spoiled rich girls!) Pair of sandals 1984 Hallmark bear (He's the same age as me!) 3 antique wind up toys 2 more tigers for my room An old baby Mr. Potatohead My sister purchased alot of clothes, antiques for her house, a sex book (hahahaha I was gonna get it, but she said she needed it more and would let me have it when she was done! HAHAHAHA), a Harley dog for her boyfriend, birdhouses, etc. My mom found clothes for herself, clothes for my brother, clothes for my dad, clothes for Cameron, clothes for CheyAnn, clothes for Alexis, a stroller for Cameron, angels for her formal livingroom, decorations for the house, picture frames, Furbys (we are obsessed with those little things!), toys for the babies, etc. I think we did rather well. It was a fun, fun day. We stopped at Wendy's for lunch because going to yard sales sure makes you hungry! lol So today I ate: Bowl Frosted Mini Wheats w/ Milk Milk Water Spring Mix Salad Baked Potato w/chives, sour cream and butter Iced Tea Small handful Cheddar Chex Mix Popcorn 10 Mini Rolos Not terrible. Plus I got alot of exercise while yard-saling. All the walking and bending and lifting. It was hot today too, so we sweat alot. lol We stopped by CheyAnn's house to give her all her stuff, but she wasn't there. So we left it with her mom and mom's boyfriend. Man that child lives in filth! That trailer is disgusting! One of their dog's is "sick." It looks freakishly starved to me! You can see EVERY bone in it's body from it's skull to its ankles! It looks deformed! It's not healthy! And my cousin (her ex and Chey's father) is threatening to call child protective services on her. Which before I thought she'd be fine, but looking at that house and that dog and the people that hang out there, I honestly think she'd be in trouble! It was a sad, sad thing. So now I am home. I might or might not update tomorrow. It depends. I don't know what time we're leaving for MC, but since its a 4 hour drive it could be EARLY! There were weekends last semester I had to WAKE UP at MIDNIGHT to make it to MC by my 8 o'clock morning class, when I'd be too busy to leave Sunday night. So, I'll have to see. It should be quite interesting. Current Mood: tired Current Music: Chingy - Right Therre.... (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, August 27th, 2004
10:37 pm	Just a few more days. So today my mom and I laid around and napped and were just plain lazy for most of the morning. It was nice. My mom very rarely takes any breaks for herself and to just be napping in the livingroom with her was a pleasant moment. We went on our walk today. The humidity was supposed to be so bad that the news was telling people to stay inside if possible, and let me tell ya, they weren't kidding. We had sweat rolling off of us. It was even dripping from our finger tips! We kept walking though. We passed this wealthy, well-to-do neighborhood near us and there was an older woman in a red dress walking. She got to the road that meets the entrance of her addition, turned around and started back the other way walking BACKWARDS! It looked so strangely natural for her. She just looked straight ahead, swung her arms and walked backwards. It was so odd. Me and mom got a good laugh out of that one! It was hilarious! Everyone was really nice today, honking and waving. We made it into town and walked around. We stopped at Tropical Snow and was met by my dad, who was checking out the grand opening of the new Lowe's. Boy, do Tropical Snows taste good on a hot day. I had a Papaya Daiquiri, I invented it myself! lol Then dad took us home. We wanted to attempt to walk home, but my dad reminded us that it would be getting dark soon and we walked some fairly dangerous roads. So we rode home. I showered and rested and ate and started hula-hooping. I only made it a half an hour before I thought I would die. I think I was dehydrated. My mom and I and maybe my sister I gonna hit some yard-sales tomorrow. It's the last thing my mom promised me we would do before I left and tomorrow there should be some good ones. I have everything packed but my shoes and I'm gonna need a BIG box for all those. lol So today. Hmmmmmmmmm, I ate: Zucchini custard w/Cool Whip 1/2 bowl Frosted Mini Wheats w/Milk Chocolate Milk Papaya Daiquiri Tropical Snow Milk Fresh Green Beans 6 Veggie Chicken Nuggets w/Low Fat Ranch Dressing Handful Cheddar Chex Mix Water Not entirely too bad. Someone commented to my last post asking if I had an eating disorder! lol Been there, done that! Since when does watching what I eat and exercising = eating disorder???? *shrugs* Oh well, I found it kinda humorous. Current Mood: sore Current Music: OLYMPICS! (that "Crash" Stevenson guy is kinda cute!) (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 26th, 2004
10:22 pm	Plllllllllllllllllllllllllttttttttttttttttt!!!! Today was the last time I get to babysit and probably see Cameron before I leave for college. I love that little guy! We had alot of fun today. If I was guaranteed to have babies as happy and as well-tempered as him, you would never be able to get me to stop reproducing! lol He's just the greatest, happiest, little baby ever. I'll miss him SO much! It rained most of the morning, which put a damper on my plans to test out my new bikinis in the neighbors' pool. Oh well, I suppose this'll just give me more time to tone up before wearing them next year. My parents left for their biking trip after it stopped raining and became quite sunny. So I cluttered up the livingroom with things that still needed to be packed. The livingroom was such a mess when they returned! I had everything sorted into piles based on where it goes in the dorm or what it is used for. lol I hate packing things in an unorganized manner. All the boxes must have themes. I think I have all the major stuff packed. Now I just have little things, mainly the things I use daily which will be packed last. My mom and I went shopping again today for the last of the last minute things. We also had to go to Penney's and buy me some bras. I'm expected to do bra and panty shots for my portfolio and well, wearing a bra full of padding that, when the only thing worn, is obviously TOO BIG and FAKE, isn't going to cut it. So I reluctantly tried on A's and AA's and NA'S (nearly A's) and PA's (perfect A's). I discovered I am an A. Just A. Which is better than AA. I was trying them on and showing my mom each one. She would get alittle embarrassed sometimes because I would just walk out of the fitting room in my bra and skirt in front of the whole world. I didn't care though. At this modeling job I'm wanting to do, I'll be in my bra and panties in front of complete strangers once a week for about 3 hours. So I guess it's about time I got used to it. We found 1 bra I ABSOLUTELY fell in love with! It's lacey and black with blue trim! CUTE! Then we bought a lacey sky blue colored one and a plain white one. So I'm better off than I was before. I have bras that fit. We visited my grandma for probably the last time before I leave also. We talked and laughed and had fun. Her room-mate has really bad Alzheimer's and she can't speak and just basically lies in her bed motionless. Her husband came in today to see her. He's such a healthy looking older man, well dressed and kind. He talked to her softly, covered her up and pulled up a chair to sit next to her. He just sat there completely content, talking to her and stroking her face and running his fingers through her hair. He's still so in love with her, even though she just lies there, speechless, motionless, cold... He still comes and affectionately spends time with her. I just sat there wanted to cry, it was the sweetest, most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I knew at that moment that was the kind of man I want in my life. That's the kind of man I want to marry. That's the kind of man I want to love. I want someone like him, who will be in love with me until death due us part, even if I can't talk, can't take care of myself, don't recognize him, am completely motionless. I felt rude, but I couldn't stop staring at him as he lovingly talked to her and carressed her. It was wonderful to witness such devotion. I worked out today too while my parents were gone and again in my room after I was done packing. I did a bunch of intense crunches and hula-hooped for a half hour. I was hoping to do more, but my abs and waist and hips and thighs were aching. Today I didn't eat too much, but I had: Zone diet bar Chocolate Milk Plain Whole Wheat Tortilla Shell Broccoli and cheese A Strawberry Daiquiri (with my mom) Cheddar Chex mix Chocolate Milk So it's not entirely terrible. I did have alot of physical activity today and more planned for tomorrow if it doesn't rain. Current Mood: sore Current Music: Olympics and they're showing reruns of Alexsei!!!! Mmmmmmmmm (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 25th, 2004
10:34 pm	Oh goodness! So today I just felt really lazy, plus there was alot of stress going on with some of my relatives and they kept calling. So because I use sleep as a stress reliever, I took an hour and a half nap. I woke up and things were quite a bit calmer. I decided to exercise a bit to try and keep myself awake. So I did, mainly working my thighs. They need ALL the help they can get! Shortly afterwards I got ready for the day. My mom made a Dr's appt. for my brother after school and since I didn't feel like staying home I went. All the nurses and most of the doctors at this office know me by name, but none of them recognized me today. They kept asking my mom how I was right in front of me! lol When they realized it was me, they couldn't believe it. One of them has ALWAYS teased me about this one visit when I came in after busting my head open on a rusty semi-trailer. I figured after not going to the pediatrician for over a year, she would have long forgotten that incident, but she didn't. She asked if I was chasing anymore semi's! I miss going to the pediatrician! The people are great! I talked to my friend Maggie in the waiting room. She was waiting for her mom and little brother. Maggie is such a sweetie! I love her to death. I went back with my brother and mom because the doctor is fricking HOTT! lol Lordy he's a good looking man! So we waited in a room for 45 minutes. My mom's cell phone kept ringing, so I was constantly leaving the room and going into the parking lot to return her calls, so she could stay with my brother. The Dr. finally came and he shook my brother's had and said, "Hello Michael!" Shook my mom's had, nodded and said, "Mrs. (last name)!" Then shook my hand, gave me an interesting glance and said, "And who is this?" It was kinda sexy how he said it with his accent. I told him who I was and he talked to me for awhile without even acknowledging that my brother was the patient here not me! I didn't mind though! lol He did an exam, blah, blah, blah and then went to check my bro's ears. Well my brother's ears were SO blocked with wax that he couldn't see the ear drum. So he got an instrument and started digging out the wax. He was pulling out chunks of wax the size of corn kernels! It was SO GROSS! He said that was the WORST case of ear wax blockage he had EVER seen and he's surprised me brother could hear at all! He had a nurse do a rinsing and cleaning of his ears. This procedure is supposed to be done once and it gets all the stuff out. They had to do it 5 TIMES in each of my brother's ears to get the junk out! Then this wet wax just fell out in big blobs! It was DISGUSTING! My brother is okay though, and he can hear a hell of alot better! He was shocked how well his hearing was improved! Immediately afterwards we went to meet the family at the Chinese restaurant. They were all there and seated already because we were late. We had fun and laughed and had a good time. I tried to stick to low-fat foods in small proportions. I went up twice for food and also got a little dessert. Mmmmmmmmmm! I made a marshmellow sundae! Second one in 2 days! LOL I LOVE those things! Then after I made mine my mom and Mimi decided it looked so good they wanted one too. So I made them both one each and they LOVED it! My aunt wanted one SO BAD, but was so full she had to pass. lol y cousin showed up with Cameron later. I love that baby! We passed him around and he had a good time. He wasn't too fond of the marshmellow sundae though, weird kid. We get to babysit him tomorrow!!!! I'm SO EXCITED! Mimi seemed okay about the fact that today would have been her and my papaw's 50th anniversary. You could tell she was upset, but she stayed calm and didn't cry. My fortune cookie said "I am the next in line for a promotion in my firm (in bed)." lol Hmmmmmm.....sounds like fun to me! There were some pretty good ones. We came home and I exercised for an hour, crunches and hula-hooping. I'm going to try to do it more daily. Especially the hula-hooping. I'm going to drag some stuff to pack down stairs tomorrow. I know if it's downstairs I will pack it instead of just letting it sit on the floor. So while my parents are gone on there bike trip, I'll be packing. UGH! Anyway, today I had: Bowl of frosted Mini Wheats with milk Glass of apple/cranberry juice cup of Italian pasta Iced Tea Fried Rice with Veggies Broccoli Fung Mei Sauteed Mushrooms 2 Sugar rolls 2 bites of cheesecake small marshmellow sundae 2 bites strawberry cake thing 2 bites coconut cake thing Cream puff thing Fortune cookie DAMN! That's terrible! TERRIBLE!!!!!!!!!!! Well, off to bed. Gotta be ready to play bright and early! :) Current Mood: full Current Music: Get Out - Jojo (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 24th, 2004
10:34 pm	The case of the shrinking boobies! So this morning was mainly spent playing with Cameron. He's SO CUTE! We both took a nap together. I was on the couch and he fell asleep on a blanket on the floor. When he woke up he crawled over to the couch, pulled himself into a standing position, looked at me sleeping, laughed, cooed and woke me up. It was the cutest thing! We won't have him tomorrow because his dad doesn't have to go in for training. I'll miss that little guy. Around 5 we went out to eat at a little cafe-type place in a little city nearby. It was nice and me and my brother kept goofing off making my parents laugh. We played with a dog outside the cafe too. We went driving around and admiring the oddly named streets and the nice scenery. It was great. So I'm finally coming to terms with the fact that I have SMALL boobs! Which is good because, 1) I can't afford to keep paying $60 a piece for silicone padded bras, 2) I hate the feeling of being fake, 3) I hate feeling like I have to enhance my boobs for guys to be attracted to me, 4) it's hard to fake having boobs when you're a SEMI-NUDE, possibly soon to be NUDE model! LoL! So today I decided I would try wearing a regular bra instead of my 20lb silicone one. Well I dug a old bra out that used to be too tight in the band. Well, the band fit, but the cups were HUGE! So I took it off and looked at the tag and read 36A! WHAT!?!?! A?????? I was a B before college!!!! So I got out my trusty Jockey bra-sizer and refitted myself for bras, just to discover that since I've lost all this weight I've went from a B to a.........................AA!!!! DOUBLE A! The smallest bra size! The size up from a training bra! Okay Jamie BREATHE! I'm going to accept this. I'm going to be fine with the fact that I have no boobs. There are guys out there that are attracted to more than just boobs, like Cody. Plus, I don't like guys who like big boobs, so this is good..........yes, yes, good, keep telling yourself that. So just to prove to myself that I was fine with it, when we went out I wore a springy halter-top dress. I had to have my mom tighten it in the chest area to keep it from falling off, but I did it and it felt good! I went with my mom to visit my grandmother (she's doing better) and do some grocery shopping. We had fun as usual together. And it just so happens my grandma was planning on ordering some new bras and was complaining about how BIG her boobs are! Then my mom, with her DOUBLE Ds chimed in and I was like.......uhhhhhhhh........yeah........I don't belong in this conversation. It was quite humorous. So now I am lying here in bed wondering what kind of damage I have done to my diet. I weighed in this morning at the weight I wanted to be before going back to MC, which was exciting, but today had: A Zone lemon diet bar Water 5 Veggie Chicken Nuggets with ketchup Plain whole wheat tortilla shell Lemon-Lime Kool Aid Iced Tea Cup of Cole Slaw 6 and 1/2 Jalapeno poppers (homemade Mmmmmmmmm) Small Marshmellow sundae (HEAVENLY! OMG) Milk So, yeah.....not good. At this cafe they have the cheapest ice-cream prices and their ice-cream is GOOD! My dad ordered a SMALL CONE, so I of course thought he was really doing well with his diet and watching what he ate......well the guy brought him the BIGGEST soft serve cone I have EVER SEEN! And I used to work in an ice-cream parlor! This thing was BIGGER than the LARGEST size we made at Jiffy Treet and it was their SMALL! I wanted to order a large just to see how it is humanly possible to fit something 2 sizes larger than what my dad ordered on a single cone! But I was quite full and didn't want to waste so much ice-cream, maybe next time. So that was my fun-filled day today. It rained though and is supposed to continue tomorrow. Grrrrrrrrrr! That means I must stay in the house and have no excuse not to pack! UGH! I have to go with my family out to Chinese for my mamaw. We were going to go to Mexican, which I was happy about, but Mimi (My mamaw) decided she'd rather go to an all-you-can-eat Chinese restaurant! UGH! I HATE ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT! Especially when I'm trying to lose weight and the majority of my family can pack away the food. So I'm going to really have to listen to my body and not be influenced by everyone else eating around me! WILL POWER! Well, must go. Later. Current Mood: bored Current Music: Olympics!!! (Comment on this)
Monday, August 23rd, 2004
11:11 pm	Is it wrong to have an orgasm while watching the Olympics???? OH MY GAWD! Alexsei Nemov of Russia is the hottest guy EVER!!!! OH BABY! YUM! YUM! He was the male gymnast with the awesome performance, but had all the controversy with the judges' scorings. So they kept showing him over and over and over and over and over! And I was like OH THERE HE IS AGAIN and YES AGAIN and OH GAWD HIM AGAIN and UHHHHHHHHHHHH AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN, AGAIN! So I was having a moment, licking the tv screen, when my mom, who had been going on also about how amazingly gorgeous this man is, said, "He looks EXACTLY LIKE CODY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" UGH! The the tv and I were having a moment and she ruined it by mentioning Cody!?!?!?!?!?! Can you believe the nerve!?!?! But Alexsei, oh Alexsei, he is HOTT! Also while my mom and I were enjoying the Olympics, we were watching a men's track race (the one where USA took all the medals). Well one of the other racers, I think it was Jamaica because he was wearing bright yellow, had the BIGGEST package we had ever seen! He seriously looked like he was trying to smuggle a softball across the finish line in his pants!!!! HUGE! Then, of course, they had to show the finish from ALL angles in slow motion and it was SO funny! You could just see this guy's massive balls going WHOMP! WHOMP! bouncing on his thighs!!!! HAHAHAHAHA I don't see how it is physically possible for him to run! It was fricking hilarious! Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Alexsei! Anyway, (I want that man!) today I went to the great and beloved gyno! I love her, she's such a sweet woman, not to mention she's seen alot more of me than ANY woman on this earth has!!! So we talked and laughed and it was painless as usual. She tends to distract me by talking about everything from school, to boys, to her sons (whom I went to school with), to anything. So I'm usually laughing so hard I kinda ignore the large metal objects, cotton swabs and fingers being shoved into me. lol But we had fun and she enjoyed catching up with me before I have to leave for school again. Then my mom and I went to Walmart for some much needed school shopping. I went over to the bathing suits and started glancing. I found TONS I liked and this late in the season they were ALL on sale!!!! So my mom and I were grabbing all the ones in my size and running to the dressing rooms! I tried on at least 30 bikinis! We found at least 15 we liked, but of course all the tops and bottoms were separate and few matched. So, we finally narrowed it down to 3 bottoms and 7 tops, that could be mixed and matched and my mom (being the one who I always force to make my final decisions) couldn't decide so we bought them all! lol But it was still a good deal. Theoretically, I got 7 new bikinis for $30. Regular price per piece was $12, so I got 7 for alittle more than one whole bikini at regular price! IMPRESSIVE! We bought tons of stuff for school and goofed off! We came home and immediately got ready for work, packed all our cleaning supplies and left for our next house. Our boss told us this house was already sold, so not to be in there too long doing extensive cleaning. He wanted us to be in and out in 2 hours! So, 5 hours later (UGH) we finished an okay job! This house was 2 stories WITH a full basement, front porch and back deck and he wanted it down in 2 HOURS! Crazy! Isn't there a thing called buy AS IS!?!?!?! Why do we have to clean it when they've already bought it???? I don't know! But this house was filthy! Gross! Disgusting! We were paid for the whole time, but our boss wasn't too pleased about forking over the extra money. I worked my ass off as fast and as hard as I could trying to clean that house in 2 hours! I have mega blisters ALL over my hands! He can deal with it! lol So we came home, wore out and starving! My dad was all full of energy and wanted to go out and do things, but we were exhausted. So we had dinner and I felt bad about not wanted to do something with my dad when he was trying so hard to spend time with me. My mom was too tired to walk today, so my dad kept offering to take me walking in some old graveyards, I kept rejecting his offer until after I ate and felt better. So we got the dog and headed to an old grave yard to look at some headstones of Revolutionary War veterans. Yeah OLD! We had fun and the dog enjoyed it. We found one grave of a 16 year old who died fighting in the Civil War! 16! My brother's age! Fighting in a war and dying for his country! That really shocked me. After that, which really didn't take too long because it was a fairly small cemetary with a MASSIVE SINK HOLE in the middle of it and a kitten my dog kept playing around with, my dad and I went to Wendy's and got Frostys! Mmmmmmmmm! We cruised on the way home and ate them, with the dog wore out in the backseat. I came home and packed alittle. 6 boxes so far. Not a huge feat, but I really hate packing. My mom gave my some more skirts for school, she's afraid if I keep losing weight I won't fit into them anymore, so she decided not to wait to give them to me. lol Tomorrow I have to help babysit my adorable, not even a year old baby cousin! I want to take him in the pool SO BAD! He'd have SO MUCH FUN! Then tomorrow at 4ish me and my family are going out to eat and for ice-cream. We were going to go on Wed, but realized that's what would have been my grandparents' 50th anniversary, so the whole family is spending the day keeping my mamaw happy and laughing and hopefully not crying, I know she will though. We're going out to eat at an authentic Mexican restaurant, which hopefully will be fun. So, I think that is about it for today. So far I've had: Vanilla Dr. Phil Weight Loss Shake Water Whole Wheat Torilla Shell Water Spaghetti 2 pieces of toast w/ butter Water Frosty Water Hmmmmmmm......not terrible, but the next two days will be killers!!!!! Oh goodness! Current Mood: anxious Current Music: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Alexsei! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, August 22nd, 2004
11:26 pm	Since my parents were gone all day with my brother on their horrific bike trip, after church and after they all left, I got into my bikini and laid out in the driveway. After alittle while I got bored though and pulled my car up and turned on the radio. I think I looked kinda funny though lying in the driveway with my Willie right next to me. Oh well, I love my car. So I was out there for awhile, just lying there. At first I seriously thought I was going to melt away. I was just pouring down sweat from everywhere! I could feel it flowing down my face, back, arms, stomach. It was SO gross! After about 20 minutes though the water works finally shut off! Then, right when I was about to doze off I heard a vehicle engine coming closer and closer and closer. There was a red truck in my driveway and a strange man approaching me! So I got up and gave him a "WHAT THE HELLL......?" look. So our conversation went like this: Him: "You folks home?" Me: "no" Him: "When are they coming back? Soon?" Me: "Maybe. I don't know." Him: "Well I was supposed to meet them. Thanks." Then he got in his truck and left. I was so nervous after that, that I couldn't stay out for much longer. I was scared I would fall asleep and he would kidnap me and no one would know what happened. So I went inside, read the paper, ate alittle and chilled around the house. It's so relaxing to just chill in an empty house in nothing but your underwear! I love it! I can't wait until I get my own place! I will just lounge around in my undies ALL THE TIME! So then I worked out and worked out and worked out and worked out until I could not move! I was shaking. While I was wokring out Striker took off with my rock! Yeah THE ROCK! MY ROCK! I jumped up and chased that little bastard all around the house and ripped that thing out of his mouth! I was MAD! So I went to wrap it in the towels I had laid out in and they were SOAKED! I assumed he had pissed on them, but it was all my sweat! It was gross! So I found a safe place nearby to rest the rock and continued working out. I eventually got so tired I laid down on the couch and fell asleep. I woke up in time to put the livingroom back together before my parents came home. I told them about the creepy guy and they had no idea who it could have been. Scary! So my mom's boss called and we have to clean tomorrow, plus my mom is now babysitting my little cousin part-time (Tues-Thurs). So me and my family were planning on: Walking through cemetaries Going out to eat in a little neighboring town for dinner and ice-cream School shopping Bikini and bra and underwear shopping (me and my mom) yard-saling and walking (mom and me) But......our scedule is like this: Mon: Dr. appt and work Tues: babysit, which I'll have to do alone for the last hour so my parents can leave with their biking group. Wed: babysit Thurs: babysit, which I'll have to do alone for the last hour so my parents can leave with their biking group. Fri: Pack Sat: Pack Sun: Pack So we have possibly 2 days (fri and sat) when we could go and do these multiple things my parents promised me we would do. Plus, ONCE this summer I actually want to get up the courage to get in my neighbors' pool. So I asked my mom if I could take Cameron in their with me while we were babysitting: Me:(asked above question) Mom: I wouldn't while we have him for the first week. Me: "WE" will only have him for the first week. After that you're on your own. Mom: (Deer in headlights look) Me: I'm leaving in ONE WEEK Mom: (Deer in headlights look) My mom has already told me she'll NEED my help on Tues and Thurs to babysit Cameron while they're gone and to clean houses with her. It seems everyone just forgot I was LEAVING! So I talked to my dad about it and he gave me a weird look too. He went to the calendar and pointed to the 7th of Sept. and said "You have 2 weeks until you leave." I pointed to the 30th of August and said, "I have ONE WEEK until I leave." Deer in headlights look from dad! Everyone thought I had two weeks after and told tham and told them and told them! GOOD LORD! Does anyone listen to me!?!?!?! So now my dad has the wrond day off from work! My mom is desperately trying to squish everything she promised me we would do into this last week. So now our schedule looks like this: Mon: Dr. appt, work, walk to town Tues: babysit, school shop Wed: babysit, graveyard walk, go out to eat Thurs: babysit, swim Fri: yard saling, bikini/bra and panty shopping, pack Sat: pack Sun: church, pack Talk about a FULL SCHEDULE! I was so emotional and felt so unlistened to I had to just cry and let it out! I've told them, they have and have read the letter from Manchester, but still they don't realize I have ONE WEEK! UGH! I'm stressed! Anyway, today I ate: Vegetarian sauage, egg and cheese wrap Cranberry juice Orange Kool Aid Cup of Italian pasta Vanilla Power Bar Water Raspberry yogurt Popcorn Water Got ahold of Corrine tonight. Can't wait to move in! It'll be so much fun! She's moving into a house 2nd semester, so I will be alone. I know I'll miss her, but I'm sure having a room of my own will be GREAT! Talked to Rob, my agent, we are getting along better now. He's a funny guy and I enjoy talking to him. The photographer has quite an active social life though, racing and concerts, so we're having problems getting my portfolio up and going. I'm sure it'll happen in due time though. Well I need to get to bed. I have an EARLY gyno appointment tomorrow! Nothing like getting cold metal objects shoved up your vagina in the morning! Best part of waking up! lol Current Mood: annoyed Current Music: I can't make you love me - Bonnie Raitt (I know the feeling) (6 Comments |Comment on this)